KILL ME NOW

because

Sun, 05 Nov 2006 08:01:07 GMT

http://catamitus.blogspot.com

Yeah.

*shrug*

Quote of the Day

ME (sarcastically): Oh, I'm so devastated. Let me contemplate suicide. Suggest a suitable method, plz.
CINDY: Jump from Po Man's head.
ME: How ingenius! But that will kill Po Man t--... good point. I can bring her down with me!
CINDY: EXACTLY! (two birds with one stone)

i love screenshots

Mon, 23 Oct 2006 12:28:09 GMT

ahhhh, iPod. My baby.

Po Man is a loser. =P (found this)

and this is the time rachel freaked out

fuck it, I might as well dedicate this entry to Po the Man.
But this is an amusing pic which sisi sent me and features kame as a woman

swish la de la swish

Sat, 21 Oct 2006 12:20:33 GMT

Today has been a good day.

Highlight of the Day
Eating lunch with my maths tutor buddies (ahhhh, we room and enjoy parabolas together). We spent twenty minutes debating on which restaurant, with me rooting for nice Sushi Train restaurant (has the most beautiful-looking sushi rolls I swear) to Mengxi Zhang and her adamant refusal to spend more than five dollars on mere food (yes, why waste money on nutrition when you can invest it on a larger textbook? =]

So we settle for this weird looking restuarant which claims to "hand make" their noodles. Then we spend a further twenty minutes debating what to eat, and fighting over what the difference between "boiled" and "in soup" really was.

Oh, let us try another restaurant next time. Can we plz plz plz plz plz go to the Sushi Train? (drools)... or at least go and eat buttered snails (I've always wanted to try la snails)

All this talk and reminscing about foot is REALLY making me drool. I shall sit here and think about unattractive things.

Oh. Well, thinking about unattractive things lead me to think about attractive things and I was thinking how sad that Jin Akanishi is leaving KAT TUN to go "focus on his linguistics". This is quite a pity, because Jin is quite a nice-looking young thing (especially after his successful plastic surgery). Rumour has it that his temporary absence is not because of a sudden itch to recover his education, but because of his dalliances with young children and his impulsive molestation of a fourteen year old female. In that case, he is an idiot to have been caught, the fourteen year old girl was not unfortunate and may Cindy Wang envy her forever.

Tee hee.

And because I am very, very bored.

List ten of your friends below.

Cindy wang.
po man cheung
ken luo.
Sisi ji
Meng xi zhang.
Elizabeth wang.
mandy kwan.
Isabel zheng.
Kathleen Alexander.
vanora chan

Now answer these questions referring to friends you listed above.

How long have you known 1: Hmmm… since the start of year ten, when she sat behind me in commerce and read my manga over my shoulder.
Have you been to 8’s house: Actually, no. She lives way too far away, man.
Do you like 6? Well…it’s … Liz. (hahaha, kidding… I thinkxP)
Are 4 and 10 friends? Sisi and Vanora? Well, they have had their lover’s tiffs…nah, of course they’re friends.
Have you been to 3’s house? Nope.
Would you ever live with 5? Oh GOD. Live with Meng xi Zhang? NEVER. (well, maybe if homelessness was the other alternative)
When was the last time you talked to 4? Oh. This afternoon. We talked about maths.
Would 1 and 6 make a good couple? Cindy and Liz? ROFL.
How about 8 and 10? Well, Isabel and Vanora DO take mod history together....
Have you ever dreamt about 2? Oh man, yes, I remember. It was an absolutely nightmare… you know that your imagination cannot conjure a thing worse than Po Man’s face. She haunts me in my sleep =(
Have you ever sleep with 9? I hope by “sleep” it’s very innocent blanket-sharing type of sleep and not… a euphemism for something else. Either way, I’m glad the answer is a, “FUCK NO.”
Is 7 attractive? 7 is Mandy Kwan. I think that speaks for itself =P
Do you love 4? In a platonic, reluctant way, maybe.
Would you ever cuddle with 1? … Is suicide an option?
Would you ever kiss 3? LOL.
What do you like about 6? Well. Well. Well. Uhm. Haha, Liz is wonderful because she’s louder than me.
Have you ever had a crush on 1, 3, 5, 7 or 9? OH MY EFFING GOD. I’VE HAD A CRUSH ON ALL OF THEM. THIS IS SUCH A BIG COINCIDENCE!!!11111
Do you ever wish that you had never met 3? YES ZOMFG. Kidding. Of course not.
How did you meet 5? Well, it involved a sauna, nudity and two sausages. Nah, seriously? We met at tutoring during year 5 and she shook my hand solemnly. That is the story of our relationship. Since then it has been all booze, whores and disco balls.
Has 2 seen you naked? Oh God, Po Man see me naked? Yeah, in her dreams.
Have you seen 2 naked? Oh God, NOT IN MY DREAMS. I repeat. NOT IN MY DREAMS.
Who is taller? 5 or 10? Erm, man, WHO is taller? Vanora or Mengxi? I think Vanora.
Have you met 4’s family? Well, I’ve met the mother. I want to meet the grandmother though =P
Would you ever go out with 3? These questions are scarily insightful.
Do you think 7 is funny? Funny as in funny ha ha, or funny strange? Well, since it’s Mandy, I shall say both.
What about 6? Aw, it’s Liz. ‘Course Liz is funny.
Where was the last place you went with 1? Well, to city I guess. This was quite an experience (and a while ago). We went to karaoke and danced like short idiots.
When was the last time you hung out with 2? Uhm, on Friday in biology.
Where do you want to take 3? Well, uhm.
When do you want to see 4? On Monday. Not for sentimentality, but because she has my maths homework.
Would 5 and 6 make a good couple? Of course. They share 10 units with each other, ok…
Have 7 and 8 ever kissed? Mandy and Isabel? LOL. We can only speculate. ‘Tis a forbidden and rather unconventional love, you see.
Would 9 or 10 ever live together? Kathleen and Vanora? I don’t think that’s a good idea to put those two freaks together.
Have you ever talked to 3 on the phone? I guess so.
Have you ever told 1 a deep dark secret? For God’s sake, don’t sound so dramatic, but yes, I guess.
Has 1 ever told you a secret? I suppose. A deep, dark one too.
Would you run away with 6? Well, I don’t think we’d get very far.
Who was the last person 9 kissed? DAN. Or her mother. Either one.
Who was the last person 7 hugged? Mandy? I’m sorry, but I don’t really keep track of her non-existent sex exploits.
What word or phrase does 5 say a lot? Meng xi Zhang has a lot of pent up wisdom. But she says, “shut up!” squeakily everytime somebody insults her. Which is VERY often.
Does 6 make you laugh? Well, Liz is Liz. And well, we do laugh at her.
Does 2 annoy you? Po Man makes up for it by being extra good with her fingers and book coverings.
When did you last call 4? Uhhhhhh, last week? A few days ago? Who knows?
Do you ever talk to 3 online? Yes
What about 2? Haha, yeah.
Does 10 smell bad? LOL. Well, it’s not her fault that she doesn’t bathe.
Does 1 smell nice? 1 is almost as bad as 10.
Are 1 and 8 friends? Reasonably so.

and since I was bored, I looked at my chat logs.
And discovered that I talk way too much for my own good.

These are the main people responsible for distracting me from a high UAI.

blogging this happily

Mon, 16 Oct 2006 12:34:58 GMT

First day back at school, and already I'm bombarded with homework that I know I'll never do. Teachers should take the hint. Gah.

Except for maths. Because there are book marks. So you'll have to do the homework.

I flinch every single time a teacher goes, "SO YEAR 12?"

WE ARE NOT IN YEAR 12. I REFUSE TO BELIEVE THAT I AM IN YEAR 12.
Not that there is anything wrong with being in denial.

Run down of ze day (feel very busy, like a bee).

Physics
Projectile motion. Copied stuff from board. Have already filled up two pages of my brilliant new physics exercise book. Go me. I am well on the way to becoming a model student, huzzah.

Maths
Maths is like torture. You can take it in small doses, but non-stop ninety minutes of it is enough to make any normal person give up and curl into a small ball. Homework is compulsory now. Life sucks. Wasted two hours of my life at home, struggling and strangling, and hating inverse functions with fiery passion. I hate inverse functions. I hate drawing them too. I have a feeling I wouldn't hate them if I didn't keep on getting them wrong though.

So yes. We spent 80 minutes doing inverse functions and 10 minutes getting acquainted with numbers which don't exist. But it is enough. Reality has sunk in. As my good math buddies agree (aka Liya, Mandy and stupid mengxi zhang), you don't realise you're in year 12 until you've had your first four unit maths lesson (well in Liya's case, first four u english lesson).

English
Oh my effing gosh. Actually did work.
Didn't feel like I did any work tho. Was in zombie-like trance due to near starvation. Could only concentrate on own stomach growling for nutrition and junk food. Did not help either that we analysed Wind in the Willows in nice glossy HSC booklet and Toad was showing his friends all his food. For God's sake, wanted to eat Toad and friends.

Chemistry
Got sheets. Learnt something about ethylene. Chem is still the best time of gossip. Yippee.

Biology
Got told off by Flanagan in very scary way. Quite unfair considering that I took great pains to be subtle. Hmph. I suppose it was the smiling which gave it away, because really, nobody, smiles at enzymes these days.

Oh, and look at that. The whole summary of my day.
The home part was less eventful. I spent two hours stabbing inverse functions, an hour tackling marketing strategies (have resolved to start studying ag NOW), another hour re-reading Mars manga (bought it in year nine, revisiting old memories) and spent the rest online.

Not a bad start to the year. =)

RACHEL AND RON'S WISDOM

Mon, 09 Oct 2006 14:49:59 GMT

RACHEL AND I ARE STARTING A NEW BOOK.

it is called

RON AND RACHEL'S GUIDE TO BEING A BETTER PERSON

we feel that we are humanitarians fighting in the deadly sea that is humanity.

Our book is very profound.

Contributions are of course welcome.

Our book has quirky ideas and self-help articles.

I present to you, our first line of wisdom:

"IF you don't have it, you won't eat it".

This is for women afraid of expanding their waist line.

I pen my wisdom here

Sat, 07 Oct 2006 12:31:29 GMT

I write here again, a saner creature than I was last time. Because since the last time I felt your presence reading this, I have successfully consumed hours and hours of fine entertainment.

I have finally finished Gravitation and all the gay mangas on http://hackthemainstream.com. I have also finished some of the Kaori Yuki mangas which my annoying friend who calls herself Cindy Wang generously gave me.

I now need more. So dear Cindy, be a kind and fruitful soul and send me a list of some of the sites you haunt frequently.

In other news, I went shopping today. I decided to pray homage to my inner bookworm and bought books, to my parents' consternation.

My book collection is looking brilliant at the moment.

So how are my holidays?

Well, the good news is that I've been reading. The bad news is that I've been reading so much, my eyes do a weird zoning out thing every now and then. Ever since the holidays have started, I have read more books than I have this whole term. Ho hum. I'm feeling all literary too.

Darling Rachel, beloved ibis, you who lent me my soul's exaltation (aka Gravitation and omfg, I'm bursting into rhyme....=O), you know how you're actually a history buff? And remember your obsession with Henry VIII's failed six marriages? Well, there is a very nice one out that I bought today. It is v. good. I think you would like it too because the brother is hot, and gay. Then he gets all beheaded and things get less sexy, but nevertheless if you still want to borrow it... *dangles it like a fishing line where you are my fat blue-eyed tuna*

GRAVITATION

Thu, 05 Oct 2006 05:41:24 GMT

Ahhhhhhhhhhhh *sighs like an eighty year old fangirl*
I love it <3

Some more priceless quotes.

SHUICHI: I want to live with you!
EIRI: Wtf are you talking about? Have you gone insane?
SHUICHI: What's the big deal? You've got more space than you need.
EIRI: What's that to you?
SHUICHI: Look, I'll cook and clean and do the laundry. You won't even notice I'm here. I'll clean your ears and give you shoulder rubs. And when the lights go out, we'll play Master and Servant!
EIRI: Forget it! Have you completely lost your mind?
SHUICHI: But...but... I don't want anyone else to be with you! I've already made up my mind and I won't share you. You know, this is OUR time, so just SHUT UP and let me unleash this zeal I feel!

EIRI (to Shuichi): Were you slow as a child?

EIRI: How can I put this delicately? I'm your average guy, but Shuichi ...when we first met, he fell in love with me because he thought that I was a woman.

EIRI (to Shuichi): The day I met you, out on the street... I should have just backed my car up and killed you.

EIRI: The thing is, when you're happy, I just want to hit you.

EIRI: I don't understand what love or friendship is. If I did, then Shuichi would mean more.

EIRI (to Shuichi who is screaming): I told you that noise is forbidden when I'm working! Why can't you just jack off quietly and then go to sleep, you stupid punk?

EIRI: If you died a hundred times, it still wouldn't be enough.

HIRO: You've been gone for a week. What have you been doing?
SHUICHI: I've been thinking.
HIRO: You shouldn't do things that aren't meant for you.

SHUICHI (to the press): SHUT THE FUCK UP ALREADY! STOP RINGING THE DOOR.
EIRI: YEAH! WE'RE HERE, WE'RE QUEER, GET USED TO IT. Does that answer your question?

K: I'll bet that Shuichi must have spent his day off mixing it, licking and banging.
SAKANO (shouting): What? Mixing it up? Shuichi won't do anything that goes against public order and his morals! But licking with Mr. Eiri Yuki... ahhh, my sweet baby?
K: What are you getting so excited about? Mixing, means enjoying yourself at the beach. Licking refers to yummy soft serve ice cream. Banging, means hustling at the mole-hitting game.
SAKANO: *pause* Oh. I knew that.

SHUICHI: There was this really scary guy. And he saw all of it... (talking about Eiri who saw his lyrics)
HIRO (only half listening): What? All of it? Were you peeing in the bushes again, or somethign?
SHUICHI: NOT THAT! The lyrics! He saw my lyrics!

and I end this blog quietly with my all time favourite:

At Shuichi's first concert. He sees Eiri who said that he wouldn't come, but came anyway. Eiri is sulking at the back.
SHUICHI: EIRI YUKI IS MINE! (announces to the whole concert, realises what he said out loud, has his "oh shit' face on)
EVERYBODY: ..... (there is a long pause)
Eiri smiles for the first time.

Gravitation

Tue, 03 Oct 2006 23:33:57 GMT

Oh man, the anime is so cute.

SHUICHI: Ask me, "Did anything good happen to you?"
HIRO: Did anything good happen to you?
SHUICHI: *love heart eyes* S.E.C.R.E.T!!
HIRO:....
SHUICHI: Now ask me, "Tell me, what is it?"

SHUICHI (dressed as a giant banana): GO SLIP ON A BANANA PEEL. AND DIE.
*next shot*
A banana peel is lying on the ground. Shuichi is running, looking very upset.
(You can guess what happens)

SHUICHI (about their new band member): He said he was sixteen years old! Sixteen!
Bad Luck is not that kind of band!

SHUICHI: I'm going to perform my first live concert in a place where my idol did. Is that fate?
LITTLE KEYBOARD BRAT: It's called "connections".

SHUICHI: OMG! You're a Ryuichi fan too? What song on his video do you like? I like the 8th one!
TATSHUA: OMG! I like the last one! The one where he gets naked!
SHUICHI: WELL AREN'T YOU NAUGHTY?
TASTUHA (staring at him): Oh. Btw... y ou look a bit like Ryuichi.
SHUICHI (modest smile): eheh. Well, I kind of imitated his hair style. AND I only use the same shampoo....

SHUICHI (upon looking at Hiro's tired face): OMG. YOU DIDN'T....
HIRO: NOOOOOO!!! (I wasn't having sex) IT WAS ONLY KARAOKE. I SWEAR.
SHUICHI: ...
HIRO: An all night ... karaoke...bar

Man, the whole thing is making me swoon like an 11 year old.

lots of weird shit

Sun, 01 Oct 2006 14:28:22 GMT

I've been reading lots of weird shit, as a consequence of the holidays starting.

Yesterday morn, I finished reading Tess of the d'Urbervilles and hey, you know, for some reason, not having to study it (and looking for shit like values and atittudes) really improves a book considerably.

It's sort of late, so I suppose I must get some shut eye. But baby, the night is young...

Which reminds me of a poem I composed on Tomodachi's diary a couple of Fridays ago. I almost forgot about it. How could I, it was sheer literary genius.

The night is young, and so are we.
Fire is hot, and so are you.
But love is blind, and so am I.

Like it?

Genius, no? (Maybe not)

But back to my original point. I finished Tess, and then went off and read some very interesting online stories (my favourite kind: blood, death and sex). My mind may be slightly more effed up now, but there's some sort of idea brewing. Holidays are always such a nice time to reflect and scrawl out random crap.

Without much further ado, I bring to you something I wrote for Rachel. I wrote this back in February, after a sleepless night which involved much tossing and turning, and an annoying mosquito. I wrote it for Rachel, one of the few people who love Harry/Draco sex more than me. So this story is dedicated to her, since it was written as a suprise for her birthday.

Note: Unfortunately there is no sex in this ficlet (I did however, write a sex-related one for Cindy). There is however some slight male/male connotations.

Harry's Favourite Colours

If Harry were an artist, he’d have a palette filled with only his favourite colours. He only has a few, not being one for flashy rainbows and iridescent specks of light, but with only his favourite colours, he’d be able to paint anything he ever wanted. Less is more, in Harry’s opinion. One colour can speak and mean so much.

Harry likes:

1. Yellow

Yellow is marigolds and baby canaries. Soft butter churning and the colour of money. Yellow is Draco’s hair when it’s still wet, flaxen and fluffy, Harry’s hand ruffling it amid squawks of protests.

Yellow is the flesh of the sweetest nectarine, dripping down the curve of Draco’s pale throat. It represents bananas and reminds Harry of phallic symbol jokes, jokes which never get old. Yellow is mellifluous honey, a syrupy warm sort of delight, liquid sugar which also happens to be fat-free.

Yellow is cowardice, fleeing from danger with the tail tucked beneath the legs, only taking shortcuts. It is scurvy fever and jaundice, in skin of the deceased. It is piercing, blinding to the eye in short intense bursts.

It is easily forgotten.

2. Red

Bold, brash, brave, brazen, bright red. The colour of sunset, crimson rays drizzling through Draco’s silhouette, casting him in carmite shadow. Red is also the luscious curve of lips, complete with Cupid’s bow and perfect blush.

Every day is a red-letter day because Draco is with him. Everyday, Harry smells the florid roses, blooming wildly along the roadside. Their thorns scratch at robin redbreasts and nightingales. Red is also dusty Quidditch robes, long-forgotten, lying in some unimportant drawer. A pretty witch Harry walks past, happens to have scarlet nails.

Red is sanguine cheeks, warm and breathless. A pointed tongue - a collection of tasty rose buds. Ragged pants, hyperventilating without breathing, in flushed ear. Burning passion, blazing like wildfire, nothing safe from its path of rage.

Red is what Harry sees when Draco kisses another man.

3. Silver

Silver is tender change and glint of wicked knife. It is Draco’s eyes, mercurial. Mercury is poisonous, having been known to kill.

Silver is valuable, rare; crystal earrings embossed with silver filigree. It is like Draco’s slender arm in the moonlight, the underside gleaming. Draco’s tongue is silver, reeking of eloquence and charm.

Fingernails under cold artificial life, is silver. Other silvery objects include: the cold metal frame of somebody’s spectacles, or tears that drip down, from eyes rolled back.

Harry kisses away Draco’s tears, and says he’s sorry.

4. Blue

Blue is the ocean, sparkling in its own effervescent beauty and treachery, with the corpses of countless good men and ships sunk beneath the depths.

Blue is the sky, cloudless, spanning across the whole wide world. It is cold, calming, relaxing. It is the colour of Draco’s blood, liquid aristocracy.

Blue is moodiness, and short fits of temper. It is the colour of the moon when Harry is actually happy.

Turquoise, cobalt, ultramarine. Cyan, cerulean.

Oxygen-starved lips in the gloom.

5. Brown

Harry likes brown. He sees furry puppies, bouncing in meadows; fresh soil still smelling of life; tanned skin from spending too many hours in the sun, basking in the rays of happiness.

Brown is blood, stained dry on parchment, immortalised. It is chocolate, sweet, to satisfy any craving. Brown is slightly burned toast, and a colour so common but so undermined by everybody else.

Coffins are brown, their polished surfaces making them smooth to touch.

The autumn leaves are brown, as they wither away.

Harry sees brown in everything, from the pews of an empty church, to the suit that Draco is wearing (but would have rather died than wear in life).

Harry walks away. He does not care for the golden sunshine, nor for the red crescent marks on his wrists (courtesy of the sharp digging nails of Draco, so insistent to live). Harry simply cannot remember the silver stars which sang of their love, nor is he aware of the glorious blue butterflies and the dancing bronzed crickets.

He can only remember yellowing books of fond memories long gone; infidelity and how his heart really broke; silvery lashes which fluttered weakly as the heart gave out; the colour of Draco’s face after Harry’s hands left that pale, pale throat, leaving red welts which soon turned brown, like bruises and the ground Draco is buried six feet under.

Harry hates his favourite colours.

fin

One colour can speak and mean so much. Harry was never one for rainbows.

Yeah yeah

Fri, 29 Sep 2006 12:23:53 GMT

Holidays have just started. I am dancing with joy. Or not.

These holidays, I'm going to sit there and waste my whole life bludging. I went to the library today (first time I visited it in two weeks too) and went and borrowed the trashiest books I could find. Books which were pink, had size 16 Times New Roman font, had double-line spacing and was about how Kate the 13year old ninny was going to date Jack Bong the 16 year old school stud/jock caught my eye in particular. So I walked out of the library feeling very satisfied and contented, clutching my pile of trashy trashy books (they couldn't fit in my bag, you see).

Then in english extension, I was sitting next to Mengxi the pest (usually I sit next to Cindy, who is an even bigger pest) and Mengxi Zhang was flipping through the intellectual-ish literature I had previously borrowed. Then I read one page and realised that it was so bad, it actually required MORE brainwork to understand Kate's intellect. Now that's ironic. Also, who the hell orders our school library books, seriously?

I remember how earlier on this year (like around in March), I borrowed Rainbow Boys (the only book which features gay guys having sex other than the Vampire Chronicles) and eagerly zoomed through the pages, searching for the sex scene. When I came to it... some IDIOT ripped out the pages.

SOMEBODY RIPPED OUT THE PAGES OF A BOOK.
More importantly, SOMEBODY RIPPED OUT THE SEX SCENES OF A PERFECTLY GOOD BOOK WTTTTTTTTTTTTTTFFFFFf

Naturally I was very outraged and reported this matter immediately to a very .... unsympathetic librarian (aka Batley).
So far, she has done nothing to rectify the situation. Oh, damnations.

Anyway, moving on from my woe and disappointment, and some prick's book abuse.

Uhm.

Biology party. We ate. We talked. We talked. We ate. And so on.
A pretty uneventful last day of year 11.

Enjoy your holidays, everybody. I'm going to suck out all the fun out of this one, like a Vampire in a blood orgy.

So yeah, enjoy your holidays. Have lots of fun, be safe and don't study too much =)

An update

Thu, 28 Sep 2006 10:55:07 GMT

I'm updating for the sake of updating. In that, I don't have anything constructive or interesting to say, but am still updating.
Year 11 is ending.

It's time to be in year 12.

But everybody knows that already so I'm not really saying anything new, am I?

I'm going to go off now and have some mindless fun with the idiot box.

Cheerios.

all psyched up and ready to roll

Sun, 24 Sep 2006 11:31:23 GMT

An old quote I suddenly remembered. A typical Azn conversation.

CINDY: Geez, I don't look at porn. At least, I only look at pictures. I haven't even touched the videos!
ME (VERONICA): That's because videos cost money.
CINDY: yeah, duh.

Vanora's (havestar) dp is hilarious. It features robomode in an unflattering pose. Shake that finger, PO...Cheung =)

I must clean my room now. Getting buried amongst old newsletters is not my idea of fun. Besides, its bad feng shui.

tra la la da la

Sat, 23 Sep 2006 09:54:31 GMT

I'm currently typing this out on my sexy laptop. Ordinarily, I use my darling computer but then I realised that laptopbaby was getting all lonely. Hence, I'm admiring it. It has the cutest little mouse gadget thingy (for some weird reason, it has a USB attached to it, and also a little button on its side where when you press it, a little square pops up and magnifies everything. This is so very useful, as with old age, comes great blindness).

Seductive little silver minx is making humming noises. *sighs in technology-induced bliss*

Erm, supposed to be doing biology. Am making great headway! (In between episodes of gay anime, tee hee).

Pet Peeve of the Day:
People who have music on their blogs. And those macromedia flash/video thingies which FORCE themselves on you. GAH.

The Devil Wears Prada is a really good book. I succumbed to buying it today and no wonder they made a movie out of it. It reminds me of Memoirs of a Geisha disregarding the whole Geisha and "Land of the Rising Sun" bits.

Second Pet Peeve of the Day"
Pop ups, eurgh. No, I do not want to join Starcity Casino despite the pretty twinkling lights and money sounds. Never underestimate a good pop-up blocker. (Note to Self: Must install computer when can be bothered...)

EDIT//
hey guys, I found a picture of Cindy Wang
http://www.lostkingdoms.com/facts/factsheet48.htm

Goodbye Forever

Fri, 22 Sep 2006 12:39:27 GMT

Well, maybe not forever because year 12's will still be coming to school next week. And you know, you cannot get away from me since MSN was invented. The internet is a glorious thing, is it no?

I shall miss my year 12 self-adopted family :(

My mother and father and uncle and brother figures. I shall miss you all terribly. I shall weep and worry with you over your HSC.

Most notably, I shall miss:

my mother Dominic: Because Dominic is a beautiful, sweet angel with the most calming and soothing voice on earth. He is also the nicest person ever, always there to pat you on the back if you do badly in exams and always has such wise wisdom and exam tips. The best biology tutor (even though he doesn't even do biology at school, crazy freak). Mentor, mother figure, beautiful angel, academic genius etcetcetc

my father Dylan: VIXEN PRINCESS. *cough* No, don't get the wrong idea! Vixen is very masculine, even though he does have a girly laugh. He's going to become a lawyer, and he has a photo of me (and my annoying sister Cindy) because he loves us. Oh, Dylan, daddy and our father figure. Always there for someone to run and complain to. Daddy takes his paternal role, seriously *giggles*

my brother Ken: Ken is my brother. Actually, I have known him since I was like 6. And actually, because Ken is genius, he will get UAI of over 100 and hence, tutor me for free (kidding xP). Will probably still see him around anyway.

my uncle Saleem: (aka the Creepy Annoying One). This is the library dude who's ALWAYS there, who ALWAYS hogs the freaking chai, and who ALWAYS disses me about my size =( (Evil Bastard). Nevertheless, he shall be missed. The library will miss him too. Really but, getting a library service award for dedication is an example of being both a winner and loser at same time ^^

and these are not my family, but they deserve an honorary mention:

neighbour Tomodachi: Yes, that is our dashing gay friend who has spontaneous outbursts of Japanese. He is strange and so fun to tease on MSN (because he does his whole "BOKU IDIOT IDIOT DESU!!!" =@ thing)

neighbour Jerry: He is Cindy's.... *ducks for cover*

After procrastinating for several hours, I must do my biology homework. Dorothy made me feel very ashamed of myself when she gave me an inquisitive look and asked: "Have you done your biology homework at all, this term?" making me shift uneasily (and rather guiltily, as my idea of doing biology homework is marching up to Rachel with a "sup? I'll do all your maths homework....")

Good luck for people going on DoE hikes. You're going to be all sweaty, and camping in a cramped tent with Meng xi Zhang. Mmmm.... makes me glad that I'm not doing it xP

I shall end with QUOTE OF THE WEEK (which is chosen because it's the first thing I can think of)

KEN: You're dumb!
CINDY: You're dumb!
KEN: You're dumb!
CINDY: You're dumb!
KEN: WHAT YOU SAY IS WHAT... oh

Buckminster Fuller

Wed, 20 Sep 2006 11:58:40 GMT

Mandy and I have decided to be rebels. We're not going to bother with our chemistry research/prac. We are extremely badass. That's right, baby. (btw, the "baby" bit was not referring to Mandy Kwan as that would be disgusting and offputting)

ANYWAY. (What was I going to say again?)

Yoga turned out to be quite ... interesting. It required less flexibility than I thought it would. It was so relaxing, Sisi next to me fell asleep. She started making very uncute snuffling noises and this mystified me, so I accidentally poked her in the ribs. Twice. Then she started looking all annoyed, squinting blearily at me in the dark.

Coles icecream is strangely delicious. Canteen lady told Cindy and I to "help ourselves". Bad mistake, because darling Rachel Cheung came over armed with a giant spoon. Ended up making a mess all over the table and floor. What nice sticky fun.

I'm feeling quite glum about semi-formal. I'm kind of sitting here staring at my dress, half-wishing in a pathetic sort of way that I could go. I guess I could actually if I wanted to, but meh... I cbf. My parents have already given me my bribe of a grand. The thing is, I just don't want to be stuck at home whilst everybody's off gallivating aboard a cramped boat. Should go out to movies or something... but is there anything good on?

mandy says:

let me die

mandy says:

im so bored out of my mind

bloody hell, msn is still fucked says:
let's do something

bloody hell, msn is still fucked says:

but not together because that would be weird

OH, I just realised that I was sitting on my pen. No wonder it was slightly uncomfortable.

Mandy's telling me about her non existent sex life. Just kill me now.

Actually Mandy's always complaining about how I make her sound like such an absolute "loser" in these blogs of mine. Just whose fault is it anyway?

Man, I am so fucking boreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeed.

An example of a typical day at Ruse
*Vyanh is running towards us. She looks very excited. Hell, she is practically drooling*
VYANH: MATHS CLASSES ARE UP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1111111

Oh yes, I also promised Don that I would link him. Since I do not know how to use this LJ thing properly (last time I used it was like in year eight and that was way more than 365 days ago... and I'm still waiting for the Rachel to come and help me, and put me out of my misery) I shall link him here. Don FYI is a very intelligent male whom I have known since year eight, who has his mind poisoned by American TV.

Moving on....(to something that's sort of bugging me right now)
I think I shall do something to my hair. I was looking at a picture of myself and was horrified with its natural -ness.

<lj cut>

Next to my horrifically black head is Cindy's normal hair. Juxtaposition is a bitter bitch.

</lj cut>

why we love slash

Thu, 06 Jul 2006 12:25:56 GMT

Why we Love Slash

A readable and honest response written by a girl, who has been a dedicated fan for the past one and a half years.

Disclaimer: This response is merely an article which demonstrates my honest point of view. It is about why boy on boy media is simply more than gay porn. Please note that these viewpoints do not apply to real life (unfortunately, there is a fine line between reality and fantasy). I am also in no way dismissing heterosexual relationships (in fact, I am rather fond of them).

Also, this article may offend those with a strictly religious palate. I am sorry if you feel that way. I myself am Catholic and I believe that God has created us to love each other, and in that line of reasoning, homosexuality is not a sin because who are we to judge that a different type of love is a sin?

With such political technicalities out of the way, I present to you ten reasons why homosexual dalliances (or the “love that dares not speak its name upstairs”) are ever so viable.

Aesthetic (sexual) appeal.
That’s right. I’m listing it first and getting it out of the way. It is human psychology spanning from our Neanderthal days. What’s better than one juicy elk? Two juicy elks! In the same analogy, what’s better than one random attractive male? Two random attractive males of course. As they say on Hungry Jack ads, it is indeed “double the fun”. We live in modern society and for too long, us females have stood by and watched the males dabble in yuri and lesbian Jenna Jameson pornography whilst we devoted ourselves to the quieter arts like cooking and finger painting. Gay porn is the female backlash. That’s right (my inner feminist is on fire).
Powerplay.
In every heterosexual relationship, there are distinct dominant and submissive archetypes (I was going to use the term “roles” but thought that that sounded far too kinky). This is not so, in a homosexual relationship. For example, take the fictional characters Harry Potter and Draco Malfoy. You can have Draco Malfoy beat the shit out of Harry and then fuck him against a wall without your inner moralist screaming “Domestic abuse! Rape! 911! Evil!” or you know, “You pussy! What, are you scared of that psycho bitch? *snigger*” (please pardon my French).
the Angst Factor
They call it “character development”. Unfortunately, since homosexuality is still considered a taboo topic, what with some people thinking that it’s unnatural and disgusting and all, male participants in a homosexual relationship are more likely to come with a large amount of angst. Real well-written angst should not be underestimated. Just for the record, angst is not all wrist-slitting and emo music by candlelight, seriously.

To make things clearer, I present to you the stereotyped statistic: 90% of gay guys are FUCKED UP (but in an interesting way!)
Idealistic Scenarios
It is an acknowledged fact that there are only fifteen plot devices. This results in overuse of the clichéd boy meets girl formula. (oh hark! Boy and girl meet; they fall in love; boy loses girl temporarily; boy goes to bar and cries over peanuts and margaritas; boy finds girl again and the two have sweet sex on a yacht before the girl falls over and drowns, leaving both the responder and the boy going “wtf, that was so lame”.) *yawn*

Now, with guy/guy… the possibilities are endless. There are so many scenarios you can come up with. Use your imagination.
It’s the Sex! (And Violence)
Sex and violence is always linked. Physical proof is the popularity of the cult classics the Vampire Chronicles by Anne Rice (pretty boys! Vampires! Sex slaves! Blood Orgies! Wheee!). Why? Because the two acts of sex and violence, are perceived to be animalistic and brutal acts of self-gratification (btw, I ripped that off my Tess of the d’Urbervilles essay). Think about it. Romeo and Juliet proved to be a success because their union was FORBIDDEN (their families being mortal enemies and all that). However, wouldn’t the nice concept of love/hate be better explored if Romeo and Juliet themselves felt bitter hatred, and then fell in love, against all the odds? But then again, that wouldn’t be feasible because Juliet was all “Oh, honey nurse!” and lovey dovey and shit.

What about Romeo and Tybalt then? The tension was already there … do you see all the possibilities? Sex and violence and swimming in somebody else’s blood will always go hand in hand. This is why BDSM and vampire sex will last through the ages. Unfortunately, they don’t work well for female/male relationships because of aforementioned concrete power structures explored in point two.
L-O-V-E
What is love? In the real physical world, you don’t know why you fall in love. Bottom line: you just do and there’s no reason at all. Love is blind when it starts, becomes short-sighted when it almost ends and sees all when everything is gone, blah blah. This is not the case in the imaginary fantasy world (author’s note: I had to use the word “fantasy” in case some of you math nerds saw the word ‘imaginary’ and immediately thought of complex numbers).

There has to be a convincing reason why the two main characters fall in love with each other. Take Picture of Dorian Gray. Artist Basil falls in love with Dorian – is totally enchanted by him – for reasons none other than Dorian’s beauty and innocence. This idea is only credible, because the two characters are male and they live in a homosocial context where women cannot understand them.

Males are eternally segregated from the females in terms of psychology (and physiology, if you want me to be technical). They will always be different. Guys will never understand women and vice versa. And just how can real love “blossom” if two people don’t understand each other? Famous couples of cloistered worlds include Brokeback Mountain (rugged countryside and sheep) or Velvet Goldmine (rockstar world of glam rock). These are examples of situations where the females have no place.

Take famous couple 2#: Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy from Pride and Prejudice. (just as a sidenote, does Elizabeth ever call Darcy by his first name – Fitzwilliam? Seriously, imagine the two in bed. How kinky… and wrong). Anyway, my point is that somewhere in the middle of the book, Darcy does a complete mindspin and proposes to Elizabeth after like having only a few conversations with her. Dude, that’s not love! That’s just deciding that you like somebody and then completely overreacting! And the Titanic couple (forgot their names, oh yeah hold on, it’s Rose and Jack). How do they get together again? They go dancing together, then they’re boinking in a foggy car and the next thing you know, he’s confessing his love for her on top of an iceberg whilst the ship sinks in the background.

The truth is, in many romance books, love between the characters (how did this love develop? Why are the characters in love?) is superficially explored. When we see that the main characters are young, reasonably attractive and more importantly, are of the opposite sex, we automatically expect them to be together. (Want another example? Harry Potter and Ginny Weasley). But if the characters are of the same sex, then the responder expects the composer to delve deeper. We learn that there is something more than the conventional physical attraction. There is something more, something more than fate that ties them together. Basically, composers are more likely to explore the nature of guy/guy relationships, resulting in a deeper and more meaningful understanding of the concepts of love (wtf, I should have put THAT in my English essay).
Jealousy of the Composer
Everybody “emotionally invests” themselves when reading or watching a movie. You do it subconsciously, man. You’re scared in horror movies because you are actually there, waiting for the little girl with the eyeliner mishap to crawl down the stairs in a creepy but slow way. It’s why people cry during sad movies because they feel as if they can relate (and this is always why therapists are now suggesting movies as cheap and effective treatment).

In a romance mook (my new word because I really cbf to type up “movies and book”), the heroine is always new perfect. She’s gorgeous and witty and thin and says the right things at the right time (for examples, see Meg Cabot or Jane Evanovich or Nicholas Sparks). Either that, or she’s annoying and ugly and says the wrong things at the wrong time (again, see Meg Cabor or Jane Evanovich, but not Nicholas Sparks because he is male and an ugly female heroine is absolutely incomprehensible to him).

Anyway, my point is that it is annoying for the average female responder to read of such wondrous female characters. May all Mary-Sues die (btw, a Mary- Sue is a term used to describe perfect heroines who are badly disguised because everybody knows that they’re the authors themselves… particular if the authors are female. For more information on the concept of this, read more Jane Austen… *cough* Elizabeth *cough* Jane Fairfax).

Now, in guy/guy stories, you hardly ever see the characters being totally perfect and totally hot and totally buff. NO. They’re flawed. You don’t get sickening perfect girl meets perfect guy.
Primal Instincts of Human Nature
Here, I’m trying to tie up the whole violence!sex!power!yay! argument.

In the typical female/male relationship, the two characters know that they must abide by certain stereotypes. The female is soft, sweet, gentle, a calming and good influence. The male is hard (in all sense of the word, *immature cackle*), strong, the pillar and rock-like support for the female in times of need (that’s right, in the cold hard winter). Anyway, it’s a relationship based on BALANCE and I guess it works. But there is no real gut-wrenching raw emotion involved.

But male/male. Oh, you have your jealousy and your full body slams and blood splattering everywhere. You have your males crying (because when guys cry in books etc, you know that something is really up and there it’s not that time of the month). You see the calm, the rational, losing control on both sides. Both sides are angry and can physically and verbally abuse each other, but nobody is being taken advantage of. (Then they can go and vent out their frustration sexually!)
The Perfect Match
- because nobody else is good enough, except for another male.

A friend once told me that he reckoned that chicks dug “dangerous” guys. At the time, I replied that perhaps chicks dug HOT “dangerous” guys.

After giving it some thought, I agree with my statement. I can’t speak for the entire female population here (after all, some random girl might find sexual appeal in like, uh, Gollum from Lord of the Rings) and I’m not pretending to.

The fantasy prototype is a combination of Eiri Yuki (from Gravitation) and Fandom!Draco Malfoy (because the real one from Harry Potter is just a pathetic wimp with bleached hair). What does this mean? It means that the “perfect” guy is “dangerous” in the sense that he has not moral convictions (but does not do uncool cowardly things like rape or murder innocent bystanders). He is intelligent (eloquent with language and the like), a mastermind (if he was a gangsta, he’d be like the leader or the guy who came up with the attack plans), charismatic and alive (in the sense that when he walks into a room, people automatically look up). He doesn’t care what others think of him (indeed, he is bitchy and grouchy but hilarious at times), but cares deeply and shows it to those he loves and respects. Most importantly however, he is extremely hot/handsome/beautiful etc (but really, that goes without saying) xP.

Sadly, no such person exists in real life.

The point is, his match wouldn’t be some femme fatale chick in matching leather trenchcoat. And it wouldn’t be the dorky chick who lives across the road either FYI.

No, it’d be some innocent boy, somebody who’s gentle but can ultimately stand up to MyFantasyBot. Pretty little innocent boy himself would be a walking paradox: adorably dorky but still cool, quiet but never stands in anyone’s shadow, somebody who can sit like a nigel and look like he’s rejecting the world instead of the other way round, the antithesis to his lover but understanding him all the same because essentially, they’re the same people… he’s the perfect match. Hell, he was made to love him!

Now, don’t you see how perfect that is? Can a girl really fill those boots? (An apology to members of my own sex, but it’s the bitter truth. We girls are essentially annoying creatures. If I was male, I’d be like “fuck them” and move on to better “fish”.)
Love Conquers All
Isn’t it nice that love conquers everything, transcending gender boundaries? That’s right. Harry Potter loves Draco Malfoy, not because he wants somebody to fuck away the lonely nights, nor because everybody else expects him to. He truly loves him, even if he doesn’t want to.

Here, terminology such as “homosexual” or “heterosexual” or “bisexual” or “pansexual” or whatever, don’t apply anymore. Love is love. You love somebody regardless of their sex, appearance, shoddy personality etc. (Those are factors which make you love somebody, but essentially, you don’t love somebody because of them… if that makes sense). You love somebody for their flaws, as clichéd and disgustingly mushy that sounds.

That’s why boy/boy love is beautiful. Because Draco Malfoy loves Harry Potter back so much, he doesn’t care that they’re both male.

La! Ten linked reasons why male love will last forever. A detailed and extremely verbose explanation for why a gay relationship in a novel is deeper than “just gay porn” (a reference to what my good friend Meng xi told me last year and which raised my hackles and made me swear to write out a proper list). I’ve been meaning to write this out for a long time.

Meng, read this and weep xP.

add ME.

Wed, 25 Jan 2006 04:21:25 GMT

I just realised that there is an option which enables you to screen comments. In a fit of technological innovation, I decided to enable it. This means that you can post anything (eg. accolades of you professing your undying love for me) and nobody will be able to see it (i.e. noone will be able to mock you). So cheer up, and comment away because the world is shining, the stars are shining and you can whisper your dirty secrets to me.

On another note, this journal is Friends Only. That is, they are of a somewhat personal nature (personal is relative). To be added, you know the drill. Comment and we shall be one big happy family.

Some nice points you should have (do not have to have all):

1. We like the same stuff. Obviously, if you dislike everything I love, then we shall get along like a house on fire (come to think of it, is that how the saying goes?)

2. My friend robomode requires her "friends" to speak english. I am more accepting. You don't have to speak english but I feel that this point is stupid because how else are you going to read this? What a waste of a point.

3. We are reasonably good friends. (i.e we can have a decent conversation without mentioning the weather or maths homework).